RockmanPM Forums

TeaOfJay · **on:** February 09, 2009, 12:33:22 AM

I figure I should flex my writing muscle a bit after not using it in so long. And what better way to do it with random scripts?

If you feel the need to make a script of mine into a comic don't bother asking me about it; just credit me after the fact and maybe post a link to it in this topic. It'll inflate my ego a little.

With that intro outta the way, here's the first of what I hope to be many scripts that I write here.
--
Hello there, I'm just your average farmer. Today, I'm in a good mood. It's a beautiful day outside. The sun is shining, the birds are singing, and some strange person breaking into my house and stealing my belongings.

...Hey, wait a minute.

Farmer: Hey! What are you doing with my stuff?

???: I kind of need this stuff.

Farmer: Like hell you do! You're just a common thief.

???: No really, I need this stuff to save the world.

Both the Farmer and the thieving hero stare at each other for a few seconds. The hero is holding a potion, which an average farmer wouldn't be using anyways.

Farmer: Well then, if you really need it to save the world. I'm not stopping you!

-A few minutes later-

Farmer: Look, I know I said you can take my stuff, but what do you need an HD TV for?

Hero: I'm actually wondering what kind of farmer has an HD TV in the first place.

borockman · **Reply #1 on:** February 09, 2009, 08:49:15 AM

A rich farmer?

Lol, even more so, why did the hero steal the HDTV too?

Yep, we need more random script here.

Dr. Wily II · **Reply #2 on:** February 09, 2009, 01:05:52 PM

... LOL

Farmer, HDTV?
Man, he is rolling in money...

Same intro so far, can't wait to read more, if any.

Archer · **Reply #3 on:** February 09, 2009, 01:15:29 PM

lol

Looks great so far, can't wait to read more, if any.

TeaOfJay · **Reply #4 on:** February 09, 2009, 09:04:26 PM

Heh, thanks for the kind word guys.

Here's another one, even though it's my birthday.
---
The Hero, in need of equipment, visits one of the many item shops that are scattered around the world. The Hero notes that all the shopkeepers look the same, so either they're all related or there's a horrible cloning experiment going on. The hero quickly disregards that and looks around the store. After finding a sword to his liking, he brings it up to the counter.

Hero: I'd like this sword, please.

Merchant: That'll be 420 gold!

Hero: Uh, it's not that I don't have the gold, but why are you charging someone who's going to save the world?

Merchant: The economy is troubling, so I have to make what I can.

Hero: What are you talking about? Everyone is going about thier lives, unaware of the evil that lurks! The economy couldn't be better!

Merchant: Yes, but the king has put into place some very high taxes on us item shop owners. You should try the other stores.

Hero: What other stores? Every town I go to there's only one item shop, and it seems to belong to one of your siblings every time!

Merchant: Be that as it may, the sword still costs 420 gold.

The Hero and Merchant stare each other down for a couple of seconds. The Hero then grumbles as he reluctently pulls out the needed gold.

Hero: Here's your gold. I hope you're the first to go when the apocalypse hits.

Merchant: Thank you, come again!

Hero: Of course I'll come again since your family runs the ONLY GOD DAMN STORE.

The Hero later found a secret passage way into the shop's storage room. The Hero looted the room with impuinity, as he normally does, but with an incredible lack of guilt.

borockman · **Reply #5 on:** February 09, 2009, 11:29:08 PM

Those bastards! it's always like that! sometimes they even charge more, for some item as common as "ribbon"!

Lol the last line is feels so fulfilling!

nice I love it!

TeaOfJay · **Reply #6 on:** February 10, 2009, 02:51:35 AM

Just to repeat myself: If you guys ever feel the urge to make a comic from these scripts, do it. Not only do I not care if you do, but I encourage it. Just give me credit on the final product.

And now, another script.
---
The Hero finds himself in a forest. He walks along a calm looking path and notices a glowing spot on the ground. Usually he stops here and rests for the night. But for some reason after stepping on the glowing spot he keeps going. He is then ambushed by a General of the faction that he's fighting against.

General: We knew you would be going through Generic Forest to get to Typical Capital, Hero!

Hero: You cowardly bastard! You would ambush me as I am weary and weak? Have you no shame!?

General: Of course I have shame! Normally I wouldn't condone such cowardly tactics, but you are a special case. You have been a thorn in my side for far too long!

Hero: Are you going to keep this banter up or are we going to fight?

General: If you have a death wish, by all means, I will be obligied to grant it!

The Hero and General fight. The Hero manages to match the General blow for blow. But the Hero slows down midway into the fight, as the poison from the last monster he fought is starting to affect him. The General takes this opportunity to deliver the finishing blow. The Hero's vision begins to fade, eventually blacking out.

...So this is death.

The hero sees a white light. Instinctively, he heads towards the light. Ah, this must be the way to heaven.... How wonderous.

The Hero wakes up, standing on the glowing spot he stood on before.

Hero: Huh? I'm... Alive?

The Hero remembers what caused his death, and heals his poison before hand. He goes down the path as normal, when the General ambushes the Hero as before.

General: We knew you would be going through Generic Forest to get to Typical Capital, Hero!

Hero: You know, I would say that you're a coward, but I'm a special case so such a tactic must be used against me, right?

General: *Surprised* Uh, yes.. It appears you understand your situation.

Hero: Whatever, let's just fight.

The fight begins as normal. The Hero is in better shape than he was last time, so he fights longer than the first time he fought the general. However, he is still a bit tired, so he ends up getting killed again...

This loop continues for another seven times...

General: We knew you-

The Hero stabs the General piercing his heart, killing him. The hero then walks off (but not before looting the body of course.) He looks back at the now dead General who killed him nine times already.

Hero: [tornado fang] YOU.

The Hero walks off to Typical Capital to continue his journey.

Solar · **Reply #7 on:** February 10, 2009, 03:14:11 AM

Awesome, so that's how saving your file would work in real life

Don't stop writing. Btw, did you keep what you wrote before the crash? I really liked it.

TeaOfJay · **Reply #8 on:** February 10, 2009, 03:17:45 AM

You mean the whole LazyMan thing? I don't think I did, but I'll take a look later.

Even if I did, I'll probably make some changes to it. Make it better.

Dr. Wily II · **Reply #9 on:** February 10, 2009, 02:39:15 PM

Awesome...
Looting, the way of the hero...

And lol at the whole savepoint thing, great read man, great read.

Quote from: LazyMan on February 10, 2009, 03:17:45 AM

Even if I did, I'll probably make some changes to it. Make it better.

But... You are too lazy for that!
Just lazily repost it!

Archer · **Reply #10 on:** February 10, 2009, 02:47:04 PM

Quote from: Dr. Wily II on February 10, 2009, 02:39:15 PM

But... You are too lazy for that!
Just lazily repost it!

This is probably true.

borockman · **Reply #11 on:** February 10, 2009, 02:55:58 PM

Lol, Save point parody this time! nice!

TeaOfJay · **Reply #12 on:** February 10, 2009, 08:27:42 PM

A new script, which still keeps to this RPG theme I somehow started and kept.

Oh, and I found the old LazyMan stuff. I'm holding off on posting that for now until I can flesh out LazyMan's story some more. Plus I have a new idea for a story that I don't want to lose while I still have it fresh in my mind. I'm calling it "The Seven" for now.

Anyways, here's the script. And remember to obey the urge to comic these if you ever get it, I don't mind.
---
The Hero is walking along typical capital talking to the townsfolk and gathering information. All of which has been either moderatly useful or painfully obvious. Then there's the advice that doesn't make a lick of sense.

Random Guy: If you press and hold the B button you can run really fast! Just by looking at you, I bet you can run even in mud!

Hero: ...Did, you just stutter? What button?

Random Guy: You know, the B button, man.

Hero: I heard you the first time. Stop stuttering. What button are you talking about?

Random Guy: I'm not stuttering, man. I'm talking about the Bee (with extra emphasis on the "bee") button.

Hero: Oh, I got you. So it's a button with a "B" on it?

Random Guy: You got it man!

Hero: ...So where the hell is this button?

Random Guy: It's nowhere and somewhere at the same time.

Hero: That's stupid... And what was that about me being able to run through mud?

Random Guy: You've got the leg muscle for it, man.

The Hero covers up his legs

Hero: WHY were you looking at my legs?!

Random Guy: I was just checking to see if you were a good runner, man.

The Hero has had just enough of this blabbering loon. Without another word the Hero walks away. It's fine, since the random people he meets don't follow him when he leaves for some reason. The villager doesn't take the hint, and yells after the hero.

Random Guy: Remember to press the B button to run!

Hero: Why would I need to press a button just to run?! [tornado fang]ing moron.

However, shortly after leaving the Hero found that all he could do was walk, no matter what he tried.

Thanatos-Zero · **Reply #13 on:** February 10, 2009, 09:03:28 PM

Mah boi! This humor is what all true entertainers strife for.

Indeed it is! You sure know how to write these funny parodies.

Solar · **Reply #14 on:** February 10, 2009, 09:05:01 PM

And shortly after leaving, the hero tried to run, but all his legs could do was walk

borockman · **Reply #15 on:** February 11, 2009, 12:41:12 AM

That would be a perfect ending!

TeaOfJay · **Reply #16 on:** February 11, 2009, 01:14:57 AM

Quote from: Taiyo on February 10, 2009, 09:05:01 PM

And shortly after leaving, the hero tried to run, but all his legs could do was walk

After seeing this, I so wish I would have ended it like that.

Dr. Wily II · **Reply #17 on:** February 11, 2009, 09:06:38 AM

LOL at more fourth wall humour.

PRESS THE B BUTTON TO RUN!

Archer · **Reply #18 on:** February 11, 2009, 12:51:30 PM

Those guys are always annoying.

TeaOfJay · **Reply #19 on:** February 12, 2009, 02:57:48 AM

Here's another script, thanks to Hitomi for giving me the idea.

---
The Hero leaves Typical Capital for Moist Swamp a little closer to finishing his quest of rescuing Princess Damsel Endistress. The Hero wonders why anyone would name their daughter that, but quickly disregards that as sludge monsters appear from the swap.

Hero: Begone foul demons!

And the battle began as thus. The Hero often wished the monsters he encountered would provide witty banter, but sadly most of the monsters he meets only growled in response to his death threats.

With his enemies vanquished the Hero continues through the trail. From behind the trees thieves jumped out in front of the Hero.

Thief: Hand over yer gold, or we'll cut ya up reel gewd!

Hero: The only one being cut up is you, you horribly confused person!

The Hero wondered what the hell thieves were doing in a swamp, but disregarded that and slayed the thieves. Continuing on the trail he felt the wind pick up as a dragon landed on a dry clearing in the swamp.

Hero: Wait, what the hell is a dragon doing in a swamp?!

While the Hero was strong, he was no match for a full sized dragon at his level. Without a second thought he ran back to Typical Capital and hid in the inn. There he talked to a villager about the dragon he encountered in the swamp.

Villager: While you don't have much of a chance of finding one, dragons can be found almost anywhere in the world, even swamps! To avoid encounters with monsters it's best to move in a weaving pattern so they can't attack you.

Hero: I see. I'll have to remember that.

Villager: ...So, did you press the B button to run back here?

Hero: Oh lord, not you again!

Nekomata · **Reply #20 on:** February 12, 2009, 03:06:29 AM

you're welcome

borockman · **Reply #21 on:** February 12, 2009, 03:17:33 AM

Lol, everyone just look same don't they.

TeaOfJay · **Reply #22 on:** February 12, 2009, 06:52:38 AM

New script, this time moving away from the RPG theme. It's based off of this picture and the conversation following it.
---

Rina, Borock's sister sits inside the local diner. She sighs as she glances at the clock on the wall.

Rina: He's late.

Rina drummed her fingers on the counter. A waitress brings Rina the water she ordered moments ago. At first the waitress was about to ask Rina what's wrong, then she looked surprised as she looked behind her. Rina turned around to see what the waitress was looking at; it was him.

Guy: Er, sorry I'm late.

Rina: I'll bet you were napping again, LazyMan.

LazyMan swallowed sharply. Rina looked pissed. However, LazyMan has a story prepared which should calm her down.

LazyMan: Now, I'm sure you think I was napping, but I was actually fighting crime.

Rina raised an eyebrow.

Rina: You, fight crime? That's hard to believe.

Lazy: No really! I was on my way here when I saw someone jaywalking and-

Rina: Jaywalking?! That's the crime you were fighting?!

Lazy: Well, yeah, he was becoming a danger to himself and those around him. You should have SEEN the traffic!

Rina: I just saw the traffic, it's very calm with very few cars in the road.

Lazy: Yeah, but this was an hour ago, I even brought the guy-

Rina: Enough, just get out of here. I'll go home by myself.

Lazy: But-

Rina: Just leave me alone!

LazyMan's shoulders slump as he walked out the door. Someone was waiting for him.

Random Guy: So she was pissed?

Lazy: Very. She wouldn't even hear me out and meet you!

Random Guy: ...So, did you press the B-

Lazy: God damnit, shut up about the B Button! I'll press it to run later.

borockman · **Reply #23 on:** February 12, 2009, 07:11:40 AM

Lol, the ending caught me by surprise.

Btw, she's home now, and crying. Hmmm, I think I know who's the culprit... *crack knuckles*

TeaOfJay · **Reply #24 on:** February 12, 2009, 07:13:41 AM

It actually isn't my fault.

Go beat up the Random Guy. He won't shut up about that damned B Button.

News

TeaOfJay's Wordy Art Topic

Archer

Archer

Archer