Mega Man AXL: Zero Era

VirusChris · 5023

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Offline VirusChris

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on: December 16, 2010, 10:03:45 PM
This is my Mega Man fanfic I started two years taking place in the ZERO timeline and instead of Zero being the main character it's Axl. This is my take on it.

Summary

In Mega Man ZERO, Ciel discovered the Legendary Reploid Zero to help save the world from Neo Arcadian and Dr. Weil. But what if Ciel didn't discover Zero, but another Reploid instead? A Reploid called Axl.

Chapter 1: The Forgotten Legend
Chatper 2: Axl's Lost Days
Chapter 3: A Battle About My Past
Chapter 4: The Chameleon VS The Hawk
Chapter 5: The Jin'en Army Attacks!
Chapter 6: Underwater Ballet Of The Meikai General
Chapter 7: Phantom of the Factory
Chapter 8: Resistance Base Under Siege
Chapter 9: Infiltration of Neo Arcadian, Axl's Resolve!
Chapter 10: Ultimate Rematch! The 4 Guardians of X!
Final Chapter: Copy Reploid Axl VS Master Copy X!
Epilogue: Keeping Our Promises...


I've fixed on the first chapter on my story, with a big help from my (somewhat) beta reader Aniral-chan, and it came out even better! I'm going back to some of the older chapters to fix a few things and a few character who've kinda went OOC a bit.

So please read them and give me some feedback about it! I love to hear your thoughts about it! Since I'm on a 2 week break from school now, I'll finish working on the last chapters and take some rest before working on Mega Man AXL: Zero Era 2!

Mega Man AXL: Zero Era 2
Chapter 1: He Lives On...

« Last Edit: January 01, 2011, 08:05:28 AM by VirusChris »


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Aresian

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Reply #1 on: December 16, 2010, 10:06:20 PM
Solely because this is Axl related, I'm going to read this.

I will then give you my opinion. Thank you for giving Axl the love he deserves (hopefully). He needs attention and caring, the kind caring that only fans can give.



Offline VirusChris

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Reply #2 on: December 17, 2010, 09:37:39 PM
No problem and thanks! Axl's one of my favorite characters of all time from the X series along side with Zero!

I have a oneshot in mind featuring Axl and Marino, something cute and funny about them.

Posted on: December 16, 2010, 09:12:35 PM
Just to tell you guys I just finished writing down the Epilogue chapter, since it's the shortest and easiest to write down without worrying about too much action and other characters besides Axl and you-know-who.

However I won't post it up yet until I finish the other three chapters before it. I really put a lot of effort into the chapter, so when it's finally uploaded and my fanfic is completed please tell me what you think OK? I like to improve on my writing skills.


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Reply #3 on: December 19, 2010, 12:41:53 AM
Caught up. The development of writing skill inbetween the chapters is evident, you put a lot of time and effort into this and it shows. As far as fanfics go, I gotta say it isn't bad at all. And anything with Axl is delicious. You do a good Axl too. Very good. I'll be reading this one to the inevitable finish, no doubt.



Offline VirusChris

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Reply #4 on: December 28, 2010, 05:47:57 AM
Chapter 9 is finally done and uploaded! But give or take about 30 minutes, or around 4:00pm, for fanfiction.net to upload it.

I'm trying to finish my story by Christmas, to present it as a Christmas present to all my readers and fans of Axl who love this story! Wish me luck I got two more chapters left!

Enjoy!

Posted on: December 22, 2010, 08:35:21 PM
Unfortunately I couldn't finished the chapters before Christmas, but oh well.


Good news that I'm mostly done with Chapter 11 just got to finish the fight scenes, with that I'll have to finish chapter 10 and I'm done with this fanfic! I'll have it finished by tomorrow hopefully so I'll hope you guys will take the time to read.

I'll also release the sequel on New Year's Eve to celebrate!

Posted on: December 27, 2010, 04:01:43 AM
Alright! I finished my fanfic! Man that took so long, but I'm happy with it! So guys please give it a read and tell me what you think of it!

I added a few things there and here that plays out differently a bit from the game, but I hope you like it all the same! It will take some time to finish uploading but once it's done check it out!

Please review, comment, give me feedback whatever! I like to know your thoughts on it!


"Spirit-Soul Fusion! Invoke... VIRUS CROSS!!!" ~ Quote from my Virakins global project
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Offline Hiryu

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Reply #5 on: December 28, 2010, 06:01:38 PM
Just finished reading the first chapter, it does seem interesting and entertaining to read.



Offline VirusChris

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Reply #6 on: January 01, 2011, 08:07:49 AM
Glad to hear it! I hope you get to read all the chapters!

Anyway the sequel to my first fanfic is finally up! Check out Mega Man AXL: Zero Era 2 with the link added in, in the first post!


"Spirit-Soul Fusion! Invoke... VIRUS CROSS!!!" ~ Quote from my Virakins global project
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Offline Sakura Leic

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Reply #7 on: January 01, 2011, 09:02:24 AM
You know I've read this story and I think it has some potetial but there are somethings that really lowers this story's worth. 

First is the hundreds of grammer mistakes that litter your work, you need to make sure you actually go through your work and proofread it and not rely on Microsoft Word's spellcheck because it's just a program that checks for the spelling of words and not the meaning of the words in context if not I'd recommend a beta reader or a friend to help you with that because it makes it annoying for the reader to see a lot of those.

Second is one that one of your reviewers said that I think you fixed it's the Person A said then Person B said then Person C said and Person A said stuff, make sure you don't seem repetative when it come to that and I don't just mean the the adjectives after that but sometimes some of the character's dialouge seems a bit out of place, like you just threw it in there.  Make sure you balance that with action because people will get bored fast if there is not enough action and the lines are bland.

Third is the most important of them all that I really had a problem with, you paced it way too fast when you combined the missions but at the same time if you didn't the chapters would of been too short.  What you need to do is have longer fight scenes and be more descripted of the places that Axl is in.  Another thing is that Axl is not invincible there's no way that he can take one an entire army of Mechaniloids, Anubis Necromancess III, and Fefnir all in one sitting he'd be way too tired and exhausted and the guy he was supposed to rescue would be dead same thing with fighting Blizzack and then Leviathan strait away.  Granted he is supposed to do the boss rush thing at the end but the point is you can't combine the missions because Axl would not make through half of them he needs rest.  It's okay to put a filler in once in the while to give the reader a bit of variety too.

The point is that I like your story but you need to improve some things and spice it up a bit.

Current playthrough: Chrono Trigger and God Eater Ressurection


Offline VirusChris

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Reply #8 on: January 02, 2011, 09:56:00 AM
I see, I'll remember that.

The sequel will not have the missions doubled together and I'll try my best to be describe the areas better. And I'll try to make a filler chapter or two.
And Zero never really had a problem fighting the Mechaniloid army and Fefnir, minus Anubis, and returning to the base like nothing than again I might of forgotten to make him exhausted near the end.

And grammars, yeah I guess that's my biggest problem when writing. Unfortunately Word doesn't pick them up and I believe that's the correct way of saying those passage, I need someone to help me with that. I do have a beta reader of some sort, but she's busy with her own stuff from time to time.

Thank you for the feedback Sakura!


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JP PSN: UirusuKurisu
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Aresian

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Reply #9 on: January 04, 2011, 12:00:10 AM
OK, sorry I didn't finish yet, I got caught up with life. I will get around to finishing it soon and I will let you know my final opinion. Am happy with it so far~

Glad to see you started number 2!