Who is Jack Schitt?

Hiroki · 3163

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Hiroki

  • Cyberelf
  • *
    • Posts: 11
    • Gender: Male
    • View Profile
on: November 06, 2009, 05:19:04 AM
For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt?
We find ourselves at a loss when someone says, 'You don't know Jack Schitt!'
Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you can now respond in an intellectual way.

Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack.

In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt.

Against her parents' objections, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout. After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock, and because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Schitt Sherlock.

Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son with a rather nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt. Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens nuptials. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Horse.

Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt. Now when someone says, 'You don't know Jack Schitt,' you can correct them.

Sincerely,
Crock O. Schitt



Offline HyperSonicEXE

  • Master's Unit
  • *
    • Posts: 2590
    • Gender: Male
    • View Profile
Reply #1 on: November 06, 2009, 05:26:45 AM
Johnny, tell 'em what they've won!

"They've won DIDDLY SQUAT! Yes, one size fits all, tons of uses! It's Diddly Squat!"



Offline Flame

  • The obsessive
  • RPM Soldier
  • ****
    • Posts: 16013
    • Gender: Male
    • View Profile
Reply #2 on: November 06, 2009, 05:30:02 AM


You sir, win a magnificent amount of internets.

This made my day. XD

...When Larry the reploid accountant goes maverick of his own accord, he's certainly formidable during tax season, but he isn't going to provide X the challenge needed to make him grow as a warrior and reach his potential.


Offline Tickle Buffalo

  • SA-Class Hunter
  • *
    • Posts: 977
    • View Profile
Reply #3 on: November 06, 2009, 05:35:56 AM
Not funny in the first place, and even if it was it'd lose all its appeal by going on far far too long.

Sorry bro, better luck next time.



Offline Police Girl

  • A total qt
  • Legendary Hero
  • *
    • Posts: 16878
    • Gender: Female
  • cannons are cool i guess
    • View Profile
Reply #4 on: November 06, 2009, 05:53:19 AM
Funny. I enjoyed it.



Offline Kirby Pink

  • Joker
  • SA-Class Hunter
  • *
    • Posts: 788
    • Gender: Male
  • "I play a card."
    • View Profile
    • Sprite Album
Reply #5 on: November 06, 2009, 06:21:41 AM
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3URXxxHOmr8[/youtube]
Now you know who Jack Schitt is.



Offline Protoman Blues

  • Green Lantern of Sector 1337
  • RPM Knight
  • ****
    • Posts: 31343
    • Gender: Male
  • Searching for Wanda
    • View Profile
Reply #6 on: November 06, 2009, 08:19:44 AM
This is at least 10 years old.

Also, serves no purpose.  Locked.